- Manipulator is a person who exercises an undue influence through mental distortion and emotional exploitation, with the intention to seize power, control, benefits, and privileges at the victim’s expense.
A manipulative person pretends to be caring,loving etc at first glance. They are constantly on the lookout for a passive individual to get attention or to assess that person.
A manipulate person will often make petty demands based on their needs and wants. They will always make selfish commands regardless of how you feel. They are not interested in your personal needs and have no regard for anyone:They may pretend to show interest but they never make suggestions nor do they give advise about anything.
They enjoy bringing others down, pointing out weaknesses only because that’s they only way to get attention of someone who is not strong.
But if you’re dealing with a habitually pessimistic person, you’re at risk of being drained emotionally. Negativity can be contagious, and if you don’t take action to protect your mindset, you may find your mood infected with hostility.
Be Sensitive and Observant
Don’t let love be cloud you ;that you forget the needful, the people who get hurt most are the kindest ones. In your quest to do the best for that relationship be sensitive to how they treat you in return and the value they place on you openly (in the presence of people) because most manipulators are ashamed to associate with whom ever they’ve run down at the back
Pay attention to how much they pay attention to you. Manipulative people all have one thing in common: low empathy.
If I suspect someone of being manipulative/overly self centered (they’re all the same thing) I have this simple test:
I deliberately turn the conversation to myself and talk about myself, then I closely monitor how long I’m allowed to do this and whether the other person is paying attention. The faster I get shut down, the more manipulative the other person is. If they don’t let you go 15 seconds talking about yourself, you have a problem. If they don’t enjoy assisting you or talks about your own vision then you are at risk.
This is a kind of screening process on both sides. If you always let a manipulative person talk about themselves and their needs they will eventually start taking advantage of you.
Don’t buy into their negativity.
Don’t allow yourself to become infected with toxic negativity. Do not engage in a difficult person’s habitual skepticism. Whatever you do, don’t stoop to their level. Maintain your emotional distance. This doesn’t mean ignoring them. Nor should you try to bright-side everything. Gather the courage and say “no” diplomatically but firmly to things you don’t want ;it allows you to stand your ground while maintaining a workable relationship. Remember that your fundamental human rights include the right to set your own priorities, the right to say “no” without feeling guilty, and the right to choose your own happy and healthy lifestyle.
A manipulator often have a demanding nature and put pressure on those close to them. They want others to love and respect them, to “be there for them,” yet they are incapable of offering emotional support to others.
Limit your expectations when dealing with them. A manipulate person isn’t a good choice to turn to when you’re feeling down. When you do engage with them, use noncommittal language. Acknowledge their comments without endorsing what they are saying. Agree with them as far as you can, then rephrase their complaints using less loaded language. You can’t change their personality, but you might neutralize their toxic outlook.
Give Yourself A Break
Setting boundaries is how you give yourself a break from an encroaching negative person. You need space where you can clear your head after dealing with someone who hurts you emotionally.
One way to detect a manipulator is to see if a person acts with different faces in front of different people and in different situations, Keep the manipulate person at arm’s length to avoid being overwhelmed by their toxicity.
You aren’t required to return every call or text immediately especially When you’re frustrated or annoyed with the person, take some time to collect your thoughts.
Take charge of the conversation.
When a person is constantly complaining about certain events or subjects, you can use a technique called appreciative inquiry, which is the process of asking questions to help the person gain a more positive outlook. If the person is brooding about a past event, ask questions that focus on the positive aspects of their experiences or about the future. Such questions might include: “What are some good things that came out of that experience?” or “What would you like to see happen next time?” Reframing the negative language helps them focus on how to achieve a brighter future in a positive way.